Nosh European Bistro

Where:  4216 Oak Lawn Avenue, Dallas, TX 75219

Menu: http://www.nosheurobistro.com/menu.asp

What:  Dinner with a girlfriend

The Scene:  Mainly middle to late-middle aged couples and foursomes; bad carpet; cute napkins; very loud; something like an airport lounge; a sommelier pushing hundred dollar bottles of wine on a Tuesday night

The Drinks:  We had two bottles of wine: a syrupy pinot noir (Las Perdinas) and a bland Rosso di Montalcino (San Felice)

The Food:  I am SO OVER Pat, the food critic from Texas Monthly.  She has steered me wrong far too many times, and this time, she goes too far.  She gave Nosh a stunning review, so I was very excited to try it...Big mistake.  Sorry, dolls, but this place was the pits.  I wouldn't even recommend it to someone suffering from ageusia.

The escargot fritters tasted like..."fried."  Just like deep fried oil.  If I'm being kind, they taste like hush puppies that were fried in the same oil as popcorn shrimp.  Uck.  We also tried the pates, which were...serviceable.  However, the lavash crackers tasted like raw flour, and the accoutrements (even the cornichons!!) were floppy and bland.  But...it gets worse.

I hate to do this, but we sent the entrees back.  As my dinner companion put it, the "duck confit" tasted like "cafeteria chicken."  It was rubbery, grey, and frankly, inedible.  I didn't bother to try the sides.  We also ordered the pork shoulder, but we got the short ribs.  At least, I think it was short ribs.  It was really more like a salt lick.  But I presume that deer don't really care about the nuances of a dish. 

After sending back the entrees, we were still starving so we ordered the hazelnut financier that Pat raved about ... Sorry, it's a blonde brownie.  Like, the Betty Crocker kind of blonde brownie.  With mocha chocolate chunk Breyers ice cream...

So, now I'm furious, and eating Triscuits.  Because despite the eyepopping tab (MINUS the entrees), I'm still hungry...

Bonus:  We were free to leave...

Overall:  Never again. 

Love and (hopefully) happy stomachs,

the U.E.

Author's Note:  I know that this review seems harsh, but I really, truly have not been so disappointed in...I don't know how long.